Save The World (14)

Void by Budi Satria Kwan

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Let’s be firefighters! Emmanuel texted.

“What?” Miranda and Wallace asked.

If we figure out where the fires are coming from, we can warn everyone.

(Brains +1)

“That’s a stupid idea, kid. You’re being stupid,” Wallace grumbled.

“Hey!” Emmanuel snapped.

“It’s worth a shot at least. Who knows, maybe we just need to beat a mini-game or something and this whole thing will be over,” Miranda theorized. “Fires fought. Crisis averted.”

“Do you two play any video games?” Wallace asked.

“More than you, old man!” Miranda shot back.

“I’m not old! Sheesh!”

“Where do you think these fires are coming from?” Miranda asked.

“Um. Hmm,” Emmanuel thought long and hard about it.

* Let’s run towards the smell of smoke and sound of flames!

# Perhaps the television journalists can assist us in this endeavor.

^ Navigate by observing the flights of birds as they egress from the crimson fury!

+ Reach out to our community before they abscond from the area post haste!

(What should Miranda and Emmanuel do? Leave a Comment and let us know.)

“Really? You guys are going to get stuck on this?” Wallace asked.

“Hmmmm,” Emmanuel hummed as he pondered the situation.

“This is an easy one,” Wallace said.

“Just give us a chance to think,” Miranda said.

“We don’t have all week here! Okay, that’s it,” Wallace rolled up his sleeves.

“What are you doing?” Miranda asked.

“Eh?” Emmanuel asked.

# Turn on the goddamn TV news!

“…from our eye in the sky, what are you seeing out there, Dan?” the news anchor asked.

“Holy F#*k there’s a lot of fire down there! Woo!” Dan the Chopper Man said as they cut to aerial footage of a massive conflagration consuming the woods just west of town.

“Uh, right. What can you see right now? What are the conditions? Are the winds blowing it any one direction?”

“All I know is there’s a whole lot of f^&king flames and it’s hot as f#$k down there. It’s like a g*ddamn barbeque in this bitch. Hoooooooey!”

“Um, thank you, Dan,” the TV anchor said with trepidation. “Uh… let’s go to our man on the ground. Dave, what’s the situation in Commencement itself?”

“Jesus F$%king Christ that’s a huge fire! The whole town’s toast!” Dave howled over a chorus of car horns as a massive traffic jam built up behind him.

“Okay but how are the people reacting to this… horrific situation?”

“They’re f%^$king pissed, girl. Look at ’em. They’re trying to get the f%$k out of town. It’s a f^$king giant forest fire. How do you think they’re reacting? F$#k!”

“Can we cut his feed? Can we cut… um, anyway. We’ll have more as the situation develops.”

“Well, that’s not good,” Miranda said.

“Fires are West of town. There you go,” Wallace said, stretching his shoulders.

“Okay. But, how do we get out there? It’ll take an hour if we go by foot. Maybe if…”

# We use our bikes, then maybe we can get around the traffic jams

* Run! Just use our feet and run!

+ Someone in our neighborhood has to be willing to drive us close enough

^ Maybe we can borrow someone’s car or motorcycle? Desperate times, people!

(What should Miranda and Emmanuel do? Leave a Comment and let us know.)

“Oh my God, just go! Argh!” Wallace said, pulling out his hair.

“Would you relax? This is a huge deal. We have to do this the right way or our town could burn down,” Miranda said.

“Nope. Not doing this,” Wallace rolled up his sleeves again.

# Ride those muthahumpin bikes y’all!

“This way’s West. Let’s go, Manny!” Miranda said, pedaling fast, wind blowing her hair in her face.

“Wahoo!” Emmanuel replied, right behind her.

“Okay, which way’s the fastest to get to the edge of town?” Miranda wondered.

“Hmm.”

“And skip right past this,” Wallace said, sleeves still rolled up.

+ Nothing wrong with asking for directions when the world is at stake!

“We’re getting close to the edge of town,” Miranda said.

“Yaa!” Emmanuel cheered, pedaling as fast as he could.

“But there are traffic jams near the freeway! How are we supposed to navigate all that in time to get to the fires?” Miranda wondered.

“And here we go,” Wallace said, rolled up sleeves still intact.

^ Mini-game time! Let’s exploit this video game world for a change.

<Car Dodger!>

<Dodge the cars!>

“And wam bam bam,” Wallace chimed in.

* Just gun it! Go go go!

<You win!>

<Emmanuel and Miranda got beefy calves from all that hard core biking!>

“There’s the forest! We’re so close I can taste the smoke,” Miranda said, eyes watering.

“Cough cough!” Emmanuel coughed.

“Okay, which way through the forest?” Miranda wondered.

“Yoink!” Wallace interjected.

^ What’s this? A secret tunnel that leads right to the source of the fires? How mysterious!

-Edge of Commencement-

Secret Tunnel

“I hate tunnels. I hate them so much,” Miranda griped as they walked through the dark underground passage.

“Meh.”

“They’re the worst! I’d rather be outside in the sun. Hey, what’s with all these weird symbols on the walls?” Miranda wondered.

“Hmm,” Emmanuel stroked his chin.

“They look official. Like… military insignia?” Miranda asked, puzzling it out.

“Hmm.”

“And skip scene,” Wallace said.

-The Woods-

Fire Path

“Oh my God! So much smoke! I can’t breathe!” Miranda cried, holding her pajama shirt over her mouth.

“Cheeyack ack ack. Caaahough -ough -ough!” Emmanuel choked.

“Don’t worry, I’ll put an air screen up,” Dartanian said.

<Dartanian used Ionize! Massive Hit!>

“Wait, when did you get here?” Miranda asked.

“We ran into each other in the tunnels just now. Did you… forget already?” Dartanian asked.

“No I… weird,” Miranda said.

“Skip skip skip,” Wallace said.

-The Woods-

Inner Sanctum

“Well well. Look at this,” the boy in the shadows said as the three entered the make-shift arena.

“Eh? Waa!” Emmanuel said.

“You recognize him?” Dartanian asked.

“Yeah, that’s that hooligan from outside the school. What is he doing here?”

“I don’t know. Let’s ask him,” Dartanian offered.

“Chyaa!” Emmanuel roared.

“You got a mouth on you, bud. What would your mother think if she heard you say that?” the boy in shadow asked.

“Eh?”

“Why are you here?” Miranda asked.

“Why? Because I’m King Hooligan! I got so much XP that I’m basically a mega boss now. My smoke bombs leveled up with me and now… well, have a look.” The boy threw three orbs in the air. They exploded, producing massive flame bombs. “Pretty kickass, right?”

“Jeez! How do we stop this guy?” Dartanian wondered.

“How else? By kicking his butt!” Miranda shouted.

The boy summoned a dozen fire imps and a few muscular imps.

“Groa groa!” they flexed.

“You guys aren’t even on my level. Literally. Like, go somewhere else. This is my kingdom now.”

“Ugh, so much dialogue. Skip skip skip,” Wallace said.

“I- You- came to see- I don’t- that’s when I- But it doesn’t ma- the hooligans- the hooligans- I don’t give a- What? Why you- Ha! Don’t make me la- Oh yeah? Well how about I- That does it! You’re all dead meat!”

Prepare the Fate

Engage!

“Burn ’em up!” King Hooligan commanded.

“Wait! We aren’t ready for this!” Dartanian cried.

“You’re ready enough! Just fight him!” Wallace yelled.

“Huh? When did hobo guy get here?” Dartanian asked.

“I’m not a… Gah! You kids are the worst!” Wallace lamented.

“Sha!” Emmanuel shouted as he attacked the closest fire imp.

<Emmanuel got burned!>

“Waa!”

“Manny! They’re made of fire! What the heck are you doing?” Miranda wailed.

“Ack!”

“Miranda, you buff our stats. Emmanuel, pull some aggro but be careful. I’ll zap these guys into oblivion,” Dartanian shouted.

“Wow. Good plan,” Miranda said, impressed.

“Thanks. I play a lot of MMOs,” Dartanian replied.

“Wait, how do I buff stats?” Miranda asked, dodging a cackling fire imp.

“Just think about doing it and it’ll happen,” Dartanian replied.

<Dartanian used Photonic Burst!>

<Fire Imp 1 was obliterated!>

“Oooo, I’m so impressed,” King Hooligan said, rolling his eyes.

“Rah!” Emmanuel shouted, leading more fire imps behind him.

“Okay. Just relax and think about doing it. Think. Think,” Miranda whispered to herself.

<Miranda used Core!>

<Dartanian’s Guts were boosted!>

“Yes, that helped!” Dartanian shouted.

<Dartanian used Laser Beam!>

<Fire Imp 2 was F%*king Exploded!>

“Okay, now it’s my turn,” King Hooligan said.

<King Hooligan used Fire Bomb Line!>

<Glancing blow!>

“Dang it! You guys are slippery,” King Hooligan grumbled.

“Groa groa!” the muscular imps crowed as they leapt toward Emmanuel.

“Eek,” Emmanuel squeaked as they gave chase.

“We’re doing it! Keep it up, guys!” Miranda exclaimed.

<Miranda used Core!>

<Emmanuel’s Guts were boosted!>

“Yeah!” Emmanuel cheered.

<Dartanian used Prism!>

<Holy S*%t three Fire Imps are f$^king toast!>

“Okay, this is taking way too long. Skip skip skip,” Wallace groaned.

<This scene is unskippable>

“Wait. What?” Wallace asked, confused.

“You’re not getting out of this one,” King Hooligan taunted.

<King Hooligan used Fire Bomb Area!>

<Massive Hit!>

“Aaah!” Emmanuel shrieked.

“Ah! My arm!” Miranda cried.

“Oh no!” Dartanian also cried, patting down his clothes.

“Wait, what is this? Skip already!” Wallace yelled.

<This scene is unskippable>

“Why is this happening?” Wallace asked.

“Oh? Is there a cheater here?” King Hooligan asked.

“Um. No,” Wallace mumbled.

“Cuz I hate cheaters. Especially when they cheat against me!” King Hooligan growled.

“What is going on?” Miranda cried.

“Kiyaa!” Emmanuel shrugged.

“Why can’t I skip past this?” Wallace said, annoyed.

<This scene is unskippable>

“You!” King Hooligan screamed, pointing at Wallace.

“Uh oh,” Wallace said, wide-eyed.

“Your cheating days are done!” King Hooligan yelled.

“Oh crap! Reload reload!” Wallace cried.


Load Save File?

File 1

LV 1 Emmanuel- Mute Brawler

*3 ^1 #2 +1

Play Time- 00:25

Commencement- Fresh n’ Green Parking Lot

File 2

LV 12 Fart Knuckle- Amateur Collector

*6 ^4 #8 +2

Play Time: 4:13

El Norte- Lost Highway

File 3

Empty


Error: Files Corrupted


Error


ERROR


ERRRRRrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRrrrrrrr%$$%&^%@$%^#$%^$%^#$%^#$%^

Fyle Wun

LVL Wun MyuTe Brwllr

&4*5#6*2@9

Fil TuU

LVLVLVLVLVLVLVLVLVL

FElL ThhThhHt

EMPTY. Like Your Soul.


Wallace’s eyes went wide as dinner plates.

“Oh. Oh Shit.”

5 responses to “Save The World (14)”

  1. Ahahaha. The most meta and hilarious thing I’ve read in a while. Dan the chopper man? That’s what I’m calling you from now on.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It could mean so many things… It’s a very versatile moniker, I think LOL

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Somebody’s planning to be a serial killer— or a mushroom mincer 🤷‍♀️

        Liked by 1 person

      2. A mushroom mincer sounds likes a serial killer of mushrooms. Also, how fun would hosting a cooking show be? I could ride in on my chopper (a custom motorcycle) and show off my Tony Tony Chopper tattoo (of One Piece fame, natch) and then end the show by riding out on a helicopter’s rope ladder. Just really lean into it. Choppin it up with Dan. That’d be the name of the show. We’d be sponsored by Food Processor companies. Just, the works.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I would watch the heck out of that show. Let me know when you air the pilot. Of the chopper.

        Liked by 1 person

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